Give It To God

What a great example of what I so often do! I hold on to something that I love because I think it is what’s right for me, or what I’ve always wanted and I struggle to give it over to God; when all the while He is waiting on me to give it over to Him because he has something SOOOOOO much better than I could ever imagine for me.

My number one struggle to give over to God is whether or not He has a MOG (Man of God) waiting for me. I have good days and bad days and when the bad days come, I often fine myself weeping and begging God to bring that man to me soon because I am tired of being alone. That is the part that I hold back, not “when will I get my happily ever after, God?” but the “I am tired of being alone God!” I struggle to let go of that and I know that it means a lack of trust in God.

Father, help me to let go of this lack of trust in You. You know my heart and You know my desires. I try to surrender all of me, but somehow this one thing is the hardest to let go of. Help me to surrender it to you! I still have hope that you will answer the prayer request of a husband, but it is fading. I often wonder why you haven’t answered it yet. I wonder if I am meant to be single for the rest of my life. I wonder if there is still something you are waiting on me to do, or be, or get to before you answer the prayer. I wonder if you have already answered it and it is in front of my face but I am just not seeing it because it’s not what I thought I wanted. I wonder if you have already answered it and I completely missed it and let it pass by me like a feather in the wind. Father, I grow tired of asking for it. So, I try to live my life and focus on trying to find out what your purpose for my life is. But every now and then it comes back. God you see how it breaks my heart, and I find myself angry at you for it. When it’s not you I should be angry at. I shouldn’t be angry at all. Father please forgive me for my anger and help me to release this pain to you.  

In Jesus Name I Pray,

Amen